I Hate Kanye but…

I hate Kanye with a passion and I can’t believe all of the hype that surrounds him, but I have to admire his taste in woman. Kanye recently released a “shrine” on his blog dedicated to the Australian model and Big Brother contestant Krystal Forscutt and I can’t blame him; the girl is smoking. On a side note, Australia is quickly becoming my favorite country for exporting the finest pieces of ass since brazil took the world by storm. Back to the point, criticize Kanye all you want and trust me I do all the time; he’s a bitch that complains for not getting recognition from award shows that mean little if anything. Kanye should be thanking God that Hip Hop is in the sorry state that it is or his mediocre music would not be considered as highly as it is. So in recognition of Kanye’s taste in women I present Krystal Forscutt enjoy. 

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The Greatest Place on Earth

Well, this past week I went to what has become my wonderland. You know how kids love amusement parks well, the clubs have become my amusement park. And let me get this straight, I well defend the honor of any dancer to anybody, well not any dancer but most of them. You will run into your fair share of pimped-out, coked-out hustlers but those are easy to spot and easy to avoid. One rule I like to use is if the girl is white and has those tacky press on nails that are three inches long and she wears some sort of chain then you know to stay away. The funny thing is that these girls are so bad at there job that there really is no point in taking them to the back anyways. 

Can someone please explain to me why people decide that when two people are smoking outside that they can open up to all the perverted things that they do at strip clubs. I do not want to hear what girl sucked you off at the back or how much you paid for that service. I also do not want to hear about the threesome that cost you a weeks pay or how much money a girl hustled you for. Get this straight, dancers are there for one purpose and that is to make as much money as possible. It is an unfortunate side of the business but a lot of these girls are being beaten and fed drugs to keep them as amicable as possible.

One of the funniest things that I have heard is the girl that is actually dancing to put herself through school but cannot leave the business because they make too much money. I mean would you leave a job that is paying you a lot of money for an entry position job where you are looked down upon and treated basically as bad as a stripper is. I want the stigma that goes along with stripping to go away, that way we can get girls that basically pimp themselves out to get higher positions. Don’t get me wrong guys would do the same thing if they were in that position but getting a sex crazed supervisor/boss that would offer a guy a higher salary if he were to go down on her are few and far between. I mean, I would live on my knees if it would guarantee me a six figure salary by the time I was 30, but thats just me.

My point is that strippers are doing the same thing but just out in the open. Sure they have problems and are very easy to bed if you were to meet them for the first time out of the club. The problems do outweigh the good parts, but let me get this point across the positive aspects are usually only related to the bedroom, where your mind will be blown. The negative parts are that the girl is in all likely-hood fucking crazy and will want to make you fucking kill yourself, but the same thing can be said about any quote-on-quote normal girl. 

So my conclusion is that hooking up with a stripper can be fun for a few months but make sure that you are the trusting type because dropping off a girl at work that consists of her taking off her clothes and grinding on some dudes lap for 6 hours can be hard to swallow. 

Here are some videos of wannabe strippers 

Jessica Alba

Random Girls

Salma Hayek

Lindsey Lohan

The Hills = Best Show on TV

I came up with an equation the other night that ranks The Hills as being the best show on TV. Listen carefully because this equation is complicated, it took me about five minutes to do the calculations and that is only because I am somewhat of a genius. It goes a little something like this, Lauren + Audrina + Whitney + Heidi – Lauren’s friend/ male douches = Best Show on TV. Now let me explain the way I came up with this, I was flipping through the channels when Audrina and Lauren caught my eye, they aren’t that hot but they do rank as solid 8 out 10’s. So I began thinking back, how many shows feature so many girls that I would throw it to? The answer not many, in fact I can’t think of a show that is about nothing that has so many girls that I would bang. And on the plus side sometimes those douches that nail the girls on the show say something funny that justifies them being on the show, other then teaching men everywhere how to treat spoiled rich girls, for the layman that is treat them like shit and they will always come back for more.

**update: on second thought after quickly scanning the photos below I have downgraded my initial rating of an 8 to between a 7-7.5; still equals best show ever though

Obsession of the Week: Cars and Babes Who Love Them

I was recently introduced to a dude who is a car junkie or how he puts it a gear head. This man let me drive his tuned up WRX and let me tell you there is nothing like driving a car that has such amazing power. The output that this dude tuned his car to produce is mind boggling to me. I have never had much interest in cars and even less in modifying them but this past week has put my entire belief on hold. It’s not the fact that the car has so much power because the car comes pretty much stock with a shit load of power. It doesn’t even matter that the car is expensive to begin before the extra 15 to 20 grand he put into it, all that matters is seeing a project that took him a year and a half to complete come to fruition, that my friends is the excitement of really modifying a car. The dude added close to 300 hundred HP to his car and made it look more beautiful then most luxury cars. The thing that appealed to me the most is that the man doesn’t even race his car, he began the modifications like most do, he added some rims and a new exhaust and before he knew it he was hooked. I don’t know what took him so long, I was hooked the first time I shifted out of first gear. Now I have to go purchase a beat up BMW and build it up myself. Here are some pics of the girls that crave the tuning scene.