Why Won’t Vanessa Grow Up?

I have somewhat of an easy question to ask. Why won’t Vanessa grow up? The Vanessa I am referring to is none other then Miss Hudgens. I had never even heard of the girl before I stumbled upon her self taken masterpieces. I have never been as turned on or as ashamed before. On second thought having a hard on and being ashamed seem to fall hand in hand for me. I’m kidding I’m packing serious equipment, trust me. But I digress, Vanessa has been seen doing her costar favors by parading around town with him acting like she lets him in between her thighs. Come on Vanessa who are you kidding? pretending that your having sex with a dude so that everybody would think he is straight is so high school, grow up. Get with a man that would know what to do with your body. I myself would like to see you give Ving Rahmes a chance but I think that cruel and unusual punishment is still illegal in every state except Texas, what a confused piece of land that is. Either way, back to Vanessa that is letting her tight little body go to waste by pretending to hook up with a fairy. I have nothing against gay people, my fathers gay, but it ticks me off a little that one of them is holding such a fine piece of ass away from us heterosexuals. And by heterosexuals I mean guys that look like models and turn down sex because they can and not because their performance is inadequate and they are afraid that the girl would laugh at them. I’m just saying.

Heres my babe:

Vanessa Hudgens New Album

My favorite singer is set to release a new album sometime soon. She is my favorite singer because I like sluts that send nude pictures of themselves to their “going to come out of the closet as soon as the preteen girlies forget about me” boyfriends. Tell me that she did not look smoking posing in the buff? She even had the guts to try and bring the bush back, although I’m sure that she shaves it now. I know that all the tweenies are going to be hankering for her new album but I’m going to throw an idea out there. Why doesn’t Vanessa try and break into the Hip-Hop market. It would be easy, all she needs to do is have some new nude photos of herself, this time bush free, in the cd sleeves. Since she has some Spanish in her the black dudes wont think they sold out when they start buying the albums by the millions just to get at the pictures. If she did that I would reserve a dozen copies myself, because that girl is fine.